Week 20: Belief in Possibilities + Willingness = Courage


I found myself thinking back to MY younger days.   I recall being every bit of courage I could be – so many instances I can remember – all courage – all in my younger days.  What happened?

I realized fear had set in.
Fear of what others would think.
How what I said would be perceived.
How I acted would be received.
How ludicrous! 

e-e-cummings_quotes_courage (1)I observed various aspects of courage this week but only this evening did I lean back into something which represented MY courage. 

It had been with me for over 11 years – either in my purse or my pocket.  It now sits beside me on my desk. I looked over and realized it’s been with me all along.

I met Walter on Thursday, October 3, 2002 at a function for a local board of trade. Both our companies had signed us up to “network”.  I was scheduled to attend their annual awards ceremony – the last thing I wanted to do after having been at a meeting in the city all day. I rushed home, walked the dog, changed and showed up.  Everyone were at assigned tables. I went to sit down at an empty seat and was told it was taken. As I walked around the table to take a seat beside someone (rather than sit solo and wait for the seats beside me to fill in) I looked up and saw who I would be sitting down beside: Walter.  Over 11 years later and I can still see and feel that moment. 

21djc-time-travelJump back 10 days earlier when I was picking the dog up from my friend.  She commented that I should really start dating seriously again. I told her (emphatically) that I did not need a man in my life. 5 minutes from her house I called her from my cell – to apologize for lying to myself and her.  I did wish to date again.  I did wish to have a man in my life. However, I refused (said more emphatically) to settle for just anyone – I wanted someone to spend the rest of my life with.

Back to October 3rd.  Walter and I talked. We ate. We were entertained. We exchanged business cards. The next morning our emails to each other crossed in cyber space. We agreed we were interested in connecting again.  I went away on business the following day.

20140221_082621While in New York City, I came across a little knick knack store which sold…you guessed it… knick knacks! I purchased a small wooden keepsake box.  In it I purchased and placed 3 small metal stones: Patience; Hope; Love. 

I decided this would remind me to have courage – to be patient – to hope – to love!

The following Friday, Walter and I met for coffee. We then played pool for a few hours and eventually we went out to dinner. Interesting to now think back, so clearly on most aspects, but I do not recall who won at pool. Obviously these things do not matter!

NOW…I cannot recall what came over me…but ½ way through dinner I decided to lay all my cards on the table.  I had NEVER done anything quite as bold before! I looked Walter square in the eyes….

first dte

March 8th, 2014 will be our 10th wedding anniversary. Our son will be turning 9 in June.  We are blessed beyond what my wildest imagination could conjure back then. What I now recognize is we are where we are because of numerous acts of courage – both taken by myself and Walter.

I realize that courage is not about proceeding in spite of fear.

Courage is belief in the possibilities and the willingness to act on that belief. Hoo-Ah!

20140221_082411I leave you now with the last item which resides in my Courage box.  It is Wayne Dyer’s definition of love (from Your Erroneous Zones). Walter had recited this to me very early on in our courtship. I typed it up and put it in the box.

Love: “The ability and willingness to allow those you care for to do and be whatever they want, without any restriction that they have to satisfy you.”  Wayne Dyer

believe21I had the courage to believe.  
I had the courage to love again.
I have the courage to do whatever I believe in.
The possibilities are infinite

Walter, I dedicate this to you.                            I AM US! 

Thank you for stopping by and allowing me to share. 
Carolynn Sokil


13 thoughts on “Week 20: Belief in Possibilities + Willingness = Courage

  1. Paul Straw

    Carolynn, reading your post today brought me to loud smiles. My wife and I will be celebrating on that day also. March 8th! We will be married 15 years that day,seems just like yesterday. (man time flies) We both had to overcome fear and be courageous. Sharron had been married previously for 25 years. I am 15 years younger than her. She always told her friends if you love the guy it doesn’t matter if he is younger, shorter… When I asked her to marry me she smiled and said yes. It has been an adventure which has brought us to the MKMMA so our paths would cross… Very interesting… to be continued.

    1. Carolynn Post author

      So very cool Paul. Imagine! We both know there are no coincidences! Walter is 14 years old than I and while it may be more common with the older fellow than the woman, we also had to overcome the challenges of everyone thinking he was the grandfather to our son! I love that we are both courageous – and because of that courage we are married to the our hearts. Walter has already planned how we will recognize each other in our next life! Thank you for being on this journey together!

  2. Heather Plude

    I always enjoy reading your blogs, Carolynn. You have such a way with words (and bit strips). Isn’t that great how when we are open to receiving, we get what we are looking for? You two are special people.

  3. Cindy DiZio

    Carolynn…Now it’s your turn making me cry… that last entry quoting Wayne Dyer’s definition of Love…. and how I’ve been feeling today… very sad because I don’t feel that kind of love… I have been sad all day over a discussion had this morning between my husband, my daughters and myself.. I always try to and feel I do a good job of accepting and appreciating differences… I believe that is what can and does make life so interesting… but I feel as if my husband would be happier if I could be poured into his mold…
    I also find it cooincidental that you mention Wayne Dyer… I just finished reading Scarlett Lewis’ book…. Nurturing, Healing, Love….. She is the mother of Jesse Lewis… one of the 20 children killed at Sandy Hook Elementary School.. She has worked with Wayne Dyer and she has set up a foundation to teach children that they can choose love….that they have the power to change their thoughts and in so doing can have power in their lives…. while reading the book I have been thinking of you and your mission to teach children what we are learning with MKMMA…. I have been thinking the same thing for months now…. and wondering about the Jesse Lewis Choose Love foundation…. and how similar the missions are..
    Time for the webinar…get back later!

    1. Carolynn Post author

      Boy – you handed me a heavy one. First – I send you HUGS!

      Now – The following thought are in keeping with the concepts of Wayne Dyer in his book “Your Erroneous Zones” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN_xxtzhSuc (full audio) – the basics are that we put our expectations on other peoples actions. This is where we can realized we are challenged and then strive to evolve. Now onto the paraphrasing….

      Remember – You are in charge. This means in charge of your thoughts and your feelings. Realize you are not sad because of what he said – but that you are sad because he did not say what you wanted him to say (your expectations). Therefore you are choosing to feel sad because your expectation of him exceeds his capabilities of fulfilling YOUR expectations at this time. The fact that he has expectations of you is irrelevant as we are talking about you and that you are feeling sad. You have a choice. You are in charge.

      Hugs and Blessings. Feel free to let me know if you need to talk.

      PS: In the words of The Lego Movie “Everything is Awesome!”

  4. Peggy P

    Carolynn, this is the greatest post ever! Loved the photos, the neat box and stones, and the great comic strip. What a wonderful love story! Thank you for sharing!

  5. Rev. Daniel Partiss

    Great posting on courage… often people perceive persistance as courage, Persistence is just fgoing forward in spit of others opinions…

    Courage is actually knowing that you are alone (or close to it) in an endeavor and all indicators are not in your favor, and going forward anyway….

    You, my friend are courageous…

  6. Tammy Henry

    Beautiful post Carolynn!! Your expressions of courage and love have touched me. I have never heard of Wayne Dyer. I am going to do some reading :-)
    Tomorrow, March 9th is my one year anniversary of meeting a wonderful person whom I believe loves me unconditionally. We don’t sweat the little things and enjoy each others company regardless of the activity, even grocery shopping.
    Thank you so much for sharing!
    The two of you are wonderful special people!

    1. Carolynn Post author

      Thank you for stopping by Tammy and for leaving such wonderful comments. Wayne Dyer is amazing and I hope you enjoy. Happy Anniversary to you and your partner for reaching a year. Just remember to make each day count! Blessings & Hugs!


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